Om Namah Shivaya


Sunday, October 21, 2012

We're still married and he's still alive! *High Five!*

Sept. 21st, 2012

I jest, I jest....but not really *laugh* 

We *have* made it one month into this new journey called parenthood, are still married, and our little boy is still alive, seemingly happy, fed, diapered, and clothed.  That's quite an accomplishment!  Of course there have been a few meltdowns, on both our parts, a lack of sleep, a constant worry over whether or not we're doing the right thing, fussy times, and the battle marks of spit-up and pee...*but*... more importantly there's been laughs, smiles, tears of joy, snuggles, and moments of triumph to make up for it all.  It's been fabulous.  As for the next month, I look forward to every curve ball that being a FTM/FTP wants to throw at me.  I may cry, or I may power through, but I know this too be true...I'll do it with Tim by my side and our families one step behind and we'll figure it out.  So let's get rollin' on this next month, Punkin'!  I'm sure it's going to be glorious :)

Oct. 21st, 2012


Wednesday, October 17, 2012

"Baby wants what Baby wants when Baby wants it...

and it's your job, as parents, to figure out what that is."

These were words that my oldest sister said too me the other day on the phone when I called in tears because I wasn't sure I was doing the right things for JP.  I was concerned that he wasn't getting enough visual stimulation, or tummy time, or awake time, or sleep time, or, or, or...I mean, come on, let's get real.  What FTM (First Time Mom) *doesn't* worry about these things?  Do I *truly* believe that I am going to somehow emotionally, mentally, physiologically, or educationally disable my child?  Of course not, but as a FTM I want to make sure I'm doing the right things for him.  

These words have stuck with me.  Her following statement of "try this, try that, and try other things, then if that doesn't work put him in the car and go for a drive.  Give him a change of scenery, sometimes that's all they need" have stuck with me as well.  It's true.  nothing is going to work the same way twice.  Sure, the "5 S's" (Swaddle, Side, Swing, Shush, Suck) are proving to be *extremely* useful and work about 90-95% of the time, so it's that tricky 5% that we have to try everything else.

Is he hot...undress him.

That didn't work...

Is he cold?  Dress him again.

That didn't work either...damn...

Change the diaper...offer him food...employ the 5 S's...walk around...sing...jiggle...put in swing...take out of swing...give him a pacifier...give him a bath ...go outside...come inside...turn him over to other parent...leave him alone...pick him back up...try to snuggle in bed...try to snuggle in the chair...try...try...try...

The calm after the cranky
The bright spot too it all?  SOMETHING *will* eventually work and we will have tamed the savage beast for the moment.  This morning when he was cranky from 4-630am it took Tim turning him over to me around 545, I plopped him into his swing which worked for about 20minutes.  He then started fussin' again so I swaddled his tiny hiney as tightly as I could, held him as tightly as I could, jiggled him as "vigorously" as I could while "SHHHHHHH!"-ing right in his ear and within moments he relaxed and within minutes he gave me the contented sigh.  I then maneuvered both of us into the chair, covered us up with blankets, positioned the pillows and we both slept.

For half an hour.  *laugh*

He then woke up because he was hungry, which I had anticipated before drifting off so it was okay.  I fed, burped, and changed him, then we both fell back asleep until 9am.  Successful mommy moment.  Then this afternoon after his 2o'clock bottle, he wanted to be cranky and the only thing that worked was holding him up on my shoulder, patting his back, while bouncing up and down and "shhhh!"-ing in his ear.  He then quickly let me know, after I put him down to give myself a break, that the ONLY PLACE he wanted to be was on my chest and so up again he went.  He was gracious enough to give me enough time in his bassinet to go upstairs and grab some food and scarf about half of it down before he started grumbling, saying too me "Hey.  Mom.  I want to snuggle...NOW!" *laugh*  And so here we sit, finally.  He is sleeping comfortably on my chest and I am enjoying all the wonderful smells and sounds that go along with that and wondering what will work the next time he gets cranky.

Only JP knows, and he's not tellin' least not yet. ;)    

Friday, October 12, 2012

Happy 3 weeks JP. You are my everything.


Happy 3 weeks to our baby boy.  This song describes exactly how I feel.  Love you.

"You Are" by Carolyn Dawn Johnson
The sunlight on my shoulders,
the smile on my face.
My secret weapon, 
my favorite place.
The reason my heart skips a beat,
the broom that sweeps me off my feet.
A gentle inspiration,
my weary soul's salvation, 
the half that makes me whole. 
The gravity that grounds me,
the arms I want around me,
never letting go.
I've lived, I've lived enough
To know what is, and what's not.
You are.
All the love I wanna make,
Every breath that I wanna take
The rush that's runnin', down my spine.
The touch that takes me every time.
An innocent seduction, oh I can't get enough and,
can't help but let it show.
I lose all my composure, I'm totally exposing   
the reason I let go... 

I've lived, I've lived enough 
I know what is, and what's not. 
You are
My every hope, 
My every dream, 
You are my everything!

I've lived, I've lived enough,
I know what is, and I know what's not
You are
The sunlight on my shoulders,
the smile on my face.
My secret weapon,
 my favorite place...

Sept. 21st, 2012