One year ago yesterday I was undergoing a bi-lateral mastectomy in an effort to greatly reduce my chances of the cancer coming back, and also in hopes to get rid of all that was left as well. I woke up in recovery groggily asking "Am I clear? What about the lymph-nodes?", it wasn't until a few hours later when Dr. Ryan came by again that I grasped the fact that he had told me numerous times "The markers were clear, there's no sign of cancer left", I was relieved.
Now I've hit the huge milestone of being cancer free for a whole year. My how time has flown. I still have six months, or so, to go until I'm out of the "risk of recurrence" stage, and I can hang with that. I think cancer learned a big lesson when it decided to invade my body...it's not coming back (at least we can hope).
So thank you for the support over the past year and a half. Thank you for going along on this journey with me, and continuing still. While I wished for lots of things to happen yesterday, it's okay that I celebrated the day away mostly in solitude. Brunch with the girls was perfect in the morning, then the afternoon to myself was just fine. I won't be selfish and say what I wish would have happened, because in truth I'm a year cancer free and that's all that matters.
So in the month of Breast Cancer Awareness please make sure to get yourself checked, and if you've already found something *please* go to your doctor and get it checked out. Early detection saves lives and you can't fix the problem until you know what the problem is.
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
|Me the Teacher|
Allow me to try...
|First my hair went away|
|And then they took my girls|
Now, I'm not saying that I'm hiding or anything like that; but there is a certain level of...*difference* between who I was before cancer, who I was during it, and who I am now. So what's the illusion I speak of? What does it mean? Why do I say it in reference to myself? I've come to feel that something bigger than any of us could even *begin* to comprehend is going to happen in the next few years. I don't know what, and I certainly don't know when, but it's going to happen and when it does, we will all be revealed for who we truly are, and the true reality in which we are to live. So this, then, this life that we are all trying to carefully craft, nurture, and direct into where we want it to be because that's where *we* see ourselves in five, ten, fifteen years down the road, are undeniably #Crazy and are living in our illusion.
|In the chemo chair|
|Me the Drum Line/Band Director|
|Our fifth anniversary spent at chemo|
Think on it for a while. You may just see my crazy talk has some truth too it and if not that's okay, I'm going to keep living my life the best way I know how, enjoying it the best way I know how, being thankful for everyday I get, and continue to work on becoming the best version of myself I possibly can be until the truth is revealed to all of us.