I don't know about you, but this past week flew by with a speed that almost takes my breath away. MAP testing at the junior high and all elementaries is in full swing and EOC starts at the high school Monday. Maybe that's what did it. The silence in the hallways, the respectfulness of the kids, the large block of time to get some much needed work done...it was glorious. The MAP continues in the elementaries until the 22nd, then the true mad dash to the end of the year shall begin.
I love this time of year, spring is emerging, it's warming up and the winter doldrums are going away. I also loathe it because it is so jam-packed full of concert stress, it's "testing season". All of us are on edge because we know that these scores determine the answer(s) to a lot of issues such as who's going to get to keep their job, will we maintain our accreditation, how much bashing is going to be heaped on-top of us after the results are released, and the like. It's quite stressful, and I'm not even a core teacher! I just hope that a majority of the kids took it seriously and tried their hardest instead of getting all mad and defensive then giving up.
That's what gets me about this whole standardized test thing. I don't understand how *their* performance determines the security of *my* job. I mean, out there in the corporate world you're rated on *Your* performance of *your* job correct? So, if we're evaluated by our administrators and deemed to be competent in our position and possibly even excel at it how can it be that in reality a group of teenagers who have said "Psht *lip smack* I don't care about this test. It's stupid, it's boring, it doesn't matter", are the ones to determine the fate of the teacher. So interesting.
We had a chat about it in my 8th grade Orchestra class last Friday then Monday, the day before the testing started, it's where the above comment was said. I stopped rehearsal and told them the truth, as I saw it, about the MAP. I told them that not only do their scores have some bearing on their "beyond high school" life, but that their scores translate into money for the district, which there in turn translates into how many teachers get to keep their jobs because if the district doesn't have enough money to pay us all, some of us have to go, and when that happens their class size increases which isn't good for the kids, and the teachers who are left have their work load increase so that they're even *more* over-worked and under-paid which isn't good for anyone.
They were pretty shocked when I put it in those terms. I asked if anyone had ever talked to them about the MAP before in that way. Here's what I got back "No! I'm just told to do my best because it's important", there's the trick...they're never told *why* exactly. Now, I am probably over-simplifying it all but that's basically how those state standardized work in my (and other teacher friends of mine) opinion(s).
Then we talked about the state of the funding for schools and how incredibly scary it is for someone in my position; a "non-core" teacher. We talked about the fact that each and every one of them have a dollar sign on their rear ends. "What do you mean Mz Stout?" I told them about ADA, which for those of you not in the know stands for "Average Daily Attendance", and how every day they are here the school gets money. So every time they decide to skip, or stay home when they're not sick, the school doesn't get their ADA which as the year progresses, this number grows because there is *always* that percentage of kids who don't care about school so they don't come. Therefore, that's why we stress attendance so much, because the district needs that money to keep running, and it's also a part of the accreditation process.
They told me that it wouldn't matter because the school always gets money from the state and government and I had to laugh at that. I told them how a neighboring district is facing a $40million dollar deficit, and that they had already cut some music programs last year, and there would possibly be more on the chopping block this year. I asked them what they thought about only having Math, Science, English, and Social Studies in school. No art, no PE, no band, no orchestra, no shop, no FACS, nothing but the core subjects. A raucous chorus of protests rang through the air.
Them: "I wouldn't go to that school, I'd move"
Me: "Uh-huh, you're 15 how are you going to manage that one on your own, and I highly doubt you could persuade your parents to uproot their lives, pack up the house to try and sell it in this horrible housing market, try to find a decent house to buy but possibly won't qualify for a loan because the economy sucks so instead choose to rent an apartment then they wind up spending *more* money because they're paying rent AND mortgage cause lord knows their house won't sell very fast. Cramming you and your family into a smaller space with all your stuff, just to satisfy the whim of a young teenager? Riiiight. What else ya got?"
Them: "I'd tell them they can't get rid of those programs"
Me: "That's going to be like shouting in the wind. Now, one person may not be able to make a big enough difference, but if you all were to organize and connect with other students across the nation, *maybe* you could make a difference."
Me: "What else ya got? Thoughts? Comments? Concerns?" *Silence* "Do you comprehend now why it's important for you to do the absolute best that you can on the MAP, and not just on the MAP but in school in general? Do you now understand why it's important you're here, respectful, and ready to learn?"
Them: "I do now".
Good.
Where else out there does your job security depend upon the actions of other people, and more specifically teenagers? Yes I realize that it's only one piece of the job security puzzle, but it's an intricate piece to the whole works. Since those conversations in class, and take it all with a grain of salt as those are paraphrased in my brain/from memory, but since those conversations I have noticed a slight upward trend in respectfullness and self-awareness. Will it last? Probably not, they're teenagers and I'm sure my parents can attest to the fact that my attention span/memory wasn't that long when I was their age.
*Shrug* I don't know. I just try to bring the reality of the situation to the kids. They all say they want to be taken seriously, so here ya go...here are some serious issues that you *will* be dealing with when you get older unless the world goes off the deep end in 2012. I try to make them look past their little bubble of lipgloss, teenage hormones, iPod's, texting, sagging pants, horrible language, and skinny jeans so tight I swear the girl's circulation gets cut off to the greater world around them and how they fit into the collective conscious of the greater whole. Maybe I'll make a diff, and maybe I won't. Only time will tell.
*****
On a *completely* different note, I just started up another blog called "Just call me Imelda!; What I wore to school today" because apparently my shoes, ensembles, and hair have been creating quite a stir with not only the kids but the teachers/staff as well. Thursday after school as I was moving bak and forth between the Band and Choir room getting the Drum Line set and ready for rehearsal, I walked past the group of kids who always hang out in the Band room after school, and one of the gals says to me "You're really pretty Mrs. Stout!"...What?! Me?! You're crazy girl! *laugh* It's honestly quite surreal, because I alternate between feeling like the gangly legged, knobby kneed, crooked teethed,
stringy haired awkward teenage girl, to the out of shape, trying to find her way, insecure college girl, all.the.time. Sure, there are plenty of moments of feeling completely comfortable in my own skin and body, but the "ugly duckling" syndrome will always be a constant undercurrent in my brain. In the mean time I figured that this blog would not only be a resource for all the girls out there who want my shoes, "OOooo! Mz Stout! I'mma steal yur shoez!" *laugh* but also a nice chronicle for me of the transformation of my hair. So check it out and be super cool.
7 More Mondays!!!!!!!
Oh my it felt good to get home yesterday. I felt such a sense of relief when I drove down our drive and stepped through our door yesterday afternoon; Buck and Lilly barking joyously at my return as they followed me up to that dear face I love so much smiling sheepishly at me because I could see the relief in *his* face that I was home. *laugh* It's good to feel needed again.
I left for Osage Beach right after school on Tuesday afternoon, MMEA bound. I was super excited to get going because this was my professional conference. My chance to immerse myself in all things Band *and* Orchestra related for three days; concerts, workshops, schmoozing, partying, you name it. I will admit that I was also excited to escape the regular routine for a few days and sleep in a bed without dogs laying on my feet for a few nights *giggle*.
I arrived at my hotel (thank you Baymont Inn) and got myself settled in for the evening. I'm pretty familiar with the area so I toodled on down to the Hy-Vee to rustle up some dinner from their big salad bar and grabbed a bottle of wine labled "Little Black Dress", which I thought was appropriate to kick off my conference since I'd brought a rockin' LBD to wear with my sparkle shoes at the fancy dinner. :) I hunkered in for the evening, chatted with a friend, watched TV, and fell into a peaceful slumber to assure I was well rested for the day ahead.
Wednesday I sat through the judges training session and it was a good time. I met the man who composed two of the pieces my 8th grade Orchestra is performing, Kirt Mosier. Nice guy and writes great music so buy it! *wink wink nudge nudge* Still not sure whether or not I'll be able to judge, but it was good experience to sit through the training.
Then came my spiritual experience! The COACH outlet! Eek! You have to understand something. I *fully* admit that I have a shopping obsession, especially shoes and bags...*BUT*...I have been waiting for this shopping trip an entire year and I knew the bag was going to be 70% off because they give you a 20% off coupon when you walk in the door and there's a HUGE wall of 50% bags. (That's where I found my pink leather one last year.) I've been saving my pennies towards my goal of having cash to purchase a new COACH bag. It'd been an entire year since I'd purchased one and I was looking forward too it. I got lost with the GPS (again new highways not programmed in) so I relied on my instincts and memory of the area to guide me to the lovely bags awaiting my touch, my caress, the chance to join my collection.
I opened the door and that sweet smell of COACH leather and fabric wafted over me and enveloped me in it's embrace. The sales lady came gliding towards me with a beautiful smile as she placed the 20% off coupon in my hand and waved her hand over the wonders placed before me as joy sang from my soul. This year there was not only the large wall of 50% off clearance, but tables of discounted bags, wallets, scarfs, and keychains. Oh sweet spirits where to begin! I started with the clearance and saw the sparkle bag in person. Aside from the disco ball hanging from the strap, it wasn't as wonderful as I had imagined. So I kept going. Green leather, brown fabric, pink C's, multi stripes, navy sparkle with a black leather edge and then I saw it. Peeking behind a lavender leather bag that reminded me of my grandmother (that's not necessarily a bad thing, it just wasn't my style) was a dark plum beauty. I reached in and pulled it out to the light revealing a dark plum patent leather bag with the classic COACH "C" stitched into it. Opening it up revealed beautiful lavender lining with a large silver coin-purse in the middle. Oh I was in love, but we must not be to hasty. I put it on my shoulder and checked out my reflection in the mirror. Pretty nice, but there is more to be seen.
I kept the plum bag on my shoulder and walked my way around the store. Weaving my way between women who were similarly entranced I stumbled upon a white version of the plum bag with an emerald green lining...hmm...no this will get dirty too fast, keep moving. I check out the wallets but I already have one and it's a pain to transfer wallets often, so I look over the sunglasses. $130 for a pair of sunglasses that surely will break during marching season if my dogs don't get them first?! No thanks. I wander back towards the clearance to give it another once over before I 
commit to the plum bag when I see a gold and tan beauty that somehow escaped my attention the first time around. I pick it up and realize that I have that same style bag in denim "C" fabric and brown leather; it's one of my favorites. I slide it on my shoulder and it feels like slipping on an old friend. I look in the mirror and check the price tag. I do a quick math calculation and think "Oh yes, I must have this." But what about the plum bag? Oh this is a dilemma.
As I'm standing there pondering what to do the angelic sales lady comes over and asks if she can be of assistance. "Not unless you can help me decide which bag to get *laugh*", I reply. She smiles and says "Well they're both beautiful so I'm not sure, but let me see how much they are for you, maybe that will help." She taps away on her calculator and reveals to me a price for *BOTH* of them that falls into the budget I had allotted for ONE! Oh sweet baby Jesus! I think I might faint! I ask her to repeat herself just to confirm that I actually heard what she said to me. She repeats the same number and it was as if the heavens opened and all the divine spirits that reside above erupted into joyful chorus as a smile grew across my face. My pulse quickened and my palms got sweaty as I turned around and walked over to the check out counter. She rang them up (I even had some left over to buy a keychain and leather cleaner), wrapped them lovingly in tissue, and slid them into a COACH bag. I turned around to see ten women smiling behind me and left with my purchases. If you're a COACH lover like me and also *love* an awesome beyond understanding deal, please visit this outlet in Osage Beach, MO.
What a rush, now back to the conference. ;)
Wednesday evening was the Meyer Music Mixer (thanks folks!) and the debut of my sparkle shoes and plum bag. Both were a smashing success paired with my black skinnies and beautiful stone necklace my hubby gave me. **Travel note here: they have built new highways "Osage Beach Parkway" and "Passover Road" which made it confusing the first couple of times, especially because the GPS I had wasn't downloaded with these roads, but I figured it out after a wrong turn or two.** The mixer was a lot of fun and I saw a lot of people that I at least remembered by face if not by name, I wish I was better at that so I didn't feel kind of on the outside edge in a room full of people but I suppose it will come with time and experience.
Thursday morning was opening day of the conference. Armed with my badge and schedule jam packed I set out to reap knowledge from those more experienced than I. It's always such a hard decision to make on what to go to. So many wonderful workshops overlap and those are on top of concerts by some of the top bands, orchestras, and choirs in the state. Luckily all of the handouts from the workshops get put up on the internet after the conference so I can download anything that I want and learn even more! I started the morning listening to the Blue Springs South HS Symphonic Band, wanted to go to the MSHSAA update but the presenter was sick so I perused the exhibits for a while where I picked up the judges copies of the solos my kids are performing as well as another book of solos to add to the collection. Up next was the first general session for MMEA/MENC where I listened to some great speakers. After lunch I went to the first workshop I was really looking forward too "Tricks that Click" Proven Solutions to Your Every Day Percussion Needs" with Kevin Lepper from VanderCook College of Music. Oh I learned some really valuable tricks that have opened up a door for what we can do in the future. Thank you Professor Lepper! I stopped by the West Junior HS choir concert then it was time for the Clayton Honors Orchestra.
*WOW*
This group is comprised of 5th-8th graders who are started with the Suzuki method then invited to audition for this group after the move through book one (if memory serves). I was breathless the entire time the performed. Chills ran up and down my spine as they emotionally moved through the music with such grace, intonation, and well rounded tone. It was as if someone had pressed play on a CD and a professional symphony came sailing through the air. *Amazing*
I'm going to have to download the SmartMusic presentation on percussion because it overlapped with the Lee's Summit North HS Symphonic Band concert. After that I stopped by the "Efficient Rehearsal Technique for Orchestra" featuring Elliot Del Borgo (another composer whose work my Orchestra plays)...fantastic. I was done for the day and headed back to the hotel in hopes a dinner invitation was going to fall my way so I could break out my sassy LBD and sparkle shoes.
Unfortunately fate had other plans and I spent my evening working out (Jillian Michaels' "6week 6pack" level 2 workout is NO joke!), watching TV, & talking to my hubby while I enjoyed a protein bar, apple and some water for dinner. Oh well...maybe Friday night.
Friday morning brought gorgeous weather and "Ten Easy Ways to Immediately Improve Your Orchestra", again with Elliot Del Borgo. Great stuff, some so commonsense I wanted to smack myself in the forehead while some others made me say "Oh yeah now I'm gonna try that!" After Mr. Del Borgo's workshop I went straight back down to the exhibits on a mission to find a new baton or "geek stick" as my hubby would say, snare drum brushes and finger cymbals. I made a beeline for the Explorers Percussion booth where I picked up the perfect pair of cymbals and brushes for under $40, then stopped at the first table that had Mollard batons and found the perfect one. Felt good to have a stick back in my hand...now if I just had the opportunity to use it more!
I wanted to attend the third installment of Mr. Del Borgo's sessions but it overlapped with the Kearney HS Wind Ensemble concert so I'll have to download the handouts later. I stayed for the Summit Lakes MS String Orchestra concert and again was blown away with these young people's grace, tone, and technique. I wish my kids sounded like that...guess I'm just gonna have to *make* them! ;) I enjoyed lunch on Friday with some fine folk from different areas of the state as well as grade levels and had some good conversation. I then ran upstairs to get a good seat at the MU Bassoon Ensemble...not a chance I was going to miss this concert. It was beyond awesome. Really made me miss playing my bassoon.
After the concert I got caught up in conversation with a lovely woman who is currently going through Breast Cancer. While we shared a lot of the same experiences, her journey has been not only rougher so far than mine, but also longer and she still has quite a ways to go. I wish her nothing but strength beyond measure to make it through and any support she needs. While I was sad to miss the "Teaching your Percussionists with SmartMusic" I wouldn't have missed that conversation for anything. I'll download the workshop later.
After the bassoon concert was Park Hill HS's Symponic Band concert. I didn't want to miss Blue Springs HS's Concert Band concert so I have another workshop to download, but all concerts are worth it. I headed back to the hotel again for some R&R and a hot shower with hopes for dinner at J. Bruner's but wound up eating Taco Bell and watching TV instead. Maybe I'll get to debut my sassy LBD and sparkle shoes on Valentine's Day, who knows.
Saturday morning dawned bright and clear and I was aching to go home so I loaded up my car, bid farwell to the Baymont and MMEA, turned the GPS on, the music up and headed home. I had a scare in Boonville when a black lab that looked *just* like my Lilly-dog darted up and out of the ditch alongside the road and ran straight towards my car, dodging at the last minute as I got hit with a wall of adrenaline and a panicked moment of thinking I was going to hit this dog, to look in my rearview mirror and see it standing in the middle of the road. This was about the sixth dog I'd seen alongside the highway as I traveled there and back but the first who jumped out like it was going through some dog gang "car dodging" initiation thing or something. Sheesh! I hit some traffic irritation on 70 *surprise* and started getting impatient when I turned onto 435N. Worlds of Fun loomed in the distance as I raced along the highway towards home.
Home. What a lovely place to be. Time away always reminds us of that.
I turned onto our street and my heart sang more than when I had been at the COACH store and my pulse quickened more than the dog scare. I came down the drive, passed the door to the joyous ruckus of barks and the relieved and happy smile of my hubby. I jumped out of the car, got jumped *on* by the dogs :) and ran over to that wonderful face I love so much where I got the big ol' kiss and hug I'd been missing. Love ya babe. I'm glad to be home.
We had a chat about it in my 8th grade Orchestra class last Friday then Monday, the day before the testing started, it's where the above comment was said. I stopped rehearsal and told them the truth, as I saw it, about the MAP. I told them that not only do their scores have some bearing on their "beyond high school" life, but that their scores translate into money for the district, which there in turn translates into how many teachers get to keep their jobs because if the district doesn't have enough money to pay us all, some of us have to go, and when that happens their class size increases which isn't good for the kids, and the teachers who are left have their work load increase so that they're even *more* over-worked and under-paid which isn't good for anyone. 
Then we talked about the state of the funding for schools and how incredibly scary it is for someone in my position; a "non-core" teacher. We talked about the fact that each and every one of them have a dollar sign on their rear ends. "What do you mean Mz Stout?" I told them about ADA, which for those of you not in the know stands for "Average Daily Attendance", and how every day they are here the school gets money. So every time they decide to skip, or stay home when they're not sick, the school doesn't get their ADA which as the year progresses, this number grows because there is *always* that percentage of kids who don't care about school so they don't come. Therefore, that's why we stress attendance so much, because the district needs that money to keep running, and it's also a part of the accreditation process. 
They told me that it wouldn't matter because the school always gets money from the state and government and I had to laugh at that. I told them how a neighboring district is facing a $40million dollar deficit, and that they had already cut some music programs last year, and there would possibly be more on the chopping block this year. I asked them what they thought about only having Math, Science, English, and Social Studies in school. No art, no PE, no band, no orchestra, no shop, no FACS, nothing but the core subjects. A raucous chorus of protests rang through the air. 
*Shrug* I don't know. I just try to bring the reality of the situation to the kids. They all say they want to be taken seriously, so here ya go...here are some serious issues that you *will* be dealing with when you get older unless the world goes off the deep end in 2012. I try to make them look past their little bubble of lipgloss, teenage hormones, iPod's, texting, sagging pants, horrible language, and skinny jeans so tight I swear the girl's circulation gets cut off to the greater world around them and how they fit into the collective conscious of the greater whole. Maybe I'll make a diff, and maybe I won't. Only time will tell.
